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Writer's pictureNeil Greenwood

Portion Control at My Local Chippy

Okay, so I started typing this in my 'Daily Dose' Journal post but realised I clearly have an issue and need to rant as it was getting quite detailed lol.


For dinner, I just fancied Fish & Chips so drove up to our local chippy. They always give you FAR too much, portion wise and I have to have this dance with the woman behind the counter every time, where I protest about not wanting so much and she just gives it me anyway. I try asking for small portions but I'm convinced they think I am going to want it cheaper. I always explain I am happy to pay the same price but it's too much. Look at how many chips there are for one person with this fish...

It doesn't do justice to how many there were on that pic but, I ended up leaving loads. It's just a waste and with the cost of living crisis you would think they would be happy giving you less for the same money but it's a real hassle to get them to do it, like you are asking for more for the same money or something.?


This is how many I left and I prob forced myself to eat more than I would normally. I hate food waste and luckily (well not really lucky for her) my dog, Bella, has developed allergies that I am trying to get under control and is on a Fish and potato diet at the mo, so she ended up sharing my dinner.


The other week I asked for chips, peas and gravy and she started to get this big tray to put it in so I said "sorry can I have it in the small one please it's too much otherwise, I'll pay the same price". Well, you would have thought I called her kids ugly by the look she gave me (I've never seen her kids they very well could be, but I wouldn't tell her that either way). "It won't fit in small tray with peas". "Well just put less in". clearly this was a concept that had not occurred to her so... We reached a compromise. I got the small tray but had to forgo peas. So technically my request for chips, peas and gravy was denied and I was told in no uncertain terms told, like it or lump it or you don't get your peas. What the hell? Customer service at it's best!

Oh and can someone please explain this sign to me...

It's a bit blured as I was trying to take it being all covert like I was on an undercover Op for the CIA. It says..

"We do not sell half fried rice and chips because all our fried rice is fresh and individually made"


Well, I'm no Jessica Landsbury and this isn't 'Murder she Wrote" but this seems like an open-and-shut case to me. If it's made fresh, why can't you just make half as much? This sign is on the counter and then it's also on the wall too. The fact that you've had to make a two sign to get the message out there, clearly shows that there must have been a lot of people asking for half and half so there is clearly a demand for it? Does that not tell you something? Imagine one person wants half fried rice half chips with curry. They would get a dock-off portion of chips (that's slang for V big lol) plus a big tray of fried rice and a carton of curry sauce. Half of it would end up in the bin. What is the point? Why not give your customers what they want? It's no wonder we are in the middle of an obesity crisis when you are force-feeding people more than they want or need. Most people would hate to see food go to waste and probably overindulge so that they didn't leave so much.


If I owned a chippy and someone was prepared to pay full price for half the portion, I'd be whooping with joy and saying "Tell all your friends this is the place to be, we do half portions at full price you crazy fool".


Anyway, the fish and chips were lovely, it just over-faces me when there is a mountain of chips to climb and I've only got my comfy slippers on to make the hike. But if you have a big appetite and own a pair of elastic-waisted jogging bottoms, I highly recommend the Chippy on Rippendedn Road across the road from the Coop.


And THAT is today's Random Rant.





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